In listing what you’re grateful for, how often do you name yourself? How often do you thank yourself?
I’ll admit, I often forget to thank myself for a whole host of things. For example, when I choose to offer kindness and compassion to someone who cuts me off and flips a bird. When I choose to do deep thought inquiry and release old wounds instead of harboring resentment and justifying it. When I show the vulnerability of imperfection and not-knowing instead of the pretense façade of having it all figured out. When I give myself permission to rest. When I speak up for myself and my needs when it’s not comfortable to do so.
Each of these moments is an opportunity for a simple, “Thank you, Jenn.”
Ideally, this will become a habit. So, I’m practicing and invite you to practice with me.
Every time we say “thank you” to someone else, why not say “thank you” to ourselves?
If we pick up to-go food from a restaurant and thank the person behind the counter, we can add, “And I thank me for nourishing my body and making my day easier.”
If we get a haircut and thank our stylist, we can add, “And I thank me for taking care of myself.”
If we receive a gift from a loved one, we can add, “And I thank me for allowing myself to fully receive and experience the joy of that.” [<-- You'd be surprised at how hard receiving is for many people. I can tell you from the energy healing work I do that while many of us are very open in the front of our heart chakra (our giving side), many of us are closed in the back of our heart chakra (our ability and willingness to receive).]
In this way, we grow our gratitude, and gratitude expands and brings us more of what we’re grateful for. In this way we positively reinforce to ourselves that we are enough, that we are worthy, that we are loved, and that we are appreciated.
If we can give ourselves gratitude, we stop looking for it outside of ourselves. We stop needing others to appreciate us when we appreciate ourselves. We stop manipulating others into valuing us and our contributions when we value ourselves.
If expressing gratitude is a core value of yours, then please incorporate self-gratitude and notice what shifts for you. I'd love to hear about it!