The Compassionate Witness

Someone asked me the other day what I’m most proud of. At first my mind scanned the traditional achievements lauded by society and the various challenges I’ve managed to overcome in my almost 45 years on this planet. Then, I realized all those pale in comparison to the pride I have that I’m the person folks reach out to when they’re vulnerably experiencing a crushing emotional blow.

They trust me, over everyone else in their world, to witness them with compassion and without advice or judgment. To hold a soft, sacred, and safe space while they process whatever crisis they’re processing…and not as a crutch or because they want to be rescued.

I awoke one morning last week to a text from a friend that she’d sent at 3 a.m. She was away on vacation and had gotten an alert from her dog sitter that her normally vibrant dog had to be taken to the emergency vet. Turns out, her pup had severe pancreatitis and she was going to unexpectedly fly home to be with him. She asked me to send healing energy, which I gladly did.

By the time she arrived at the vet’s office, her precious pup was near death. She wouldn’t even have time to take him home to perform ceremony. She was distraught because she’d have to say goodbye to her fur-child in a sterile, uncomfortable, and cold vet exam room.

She texted me again and asked if I could pull an angel card for each of them. I lit a candle, pulled the cards, and sent her pictures of each. Then I flowed divine life force energy to them both and called in some spiritual support to assist her dog’s transition beyond the veil. I could feel when it was over, and her text confirmed. He was gone, and it was a peaceful transition. She was heartbroken.

She also thanked me for being there for her and said, “It needed to be private and with loving support. With no sleep I couldn’t handle other energies.”

I called her the next day to check in. She answered and we stayed on the phone for more than an hour as she verbally processed the whole experience and how she wasn’t ready yet for “the public” to know. She even declined another call coming in from her sister, who I understood was her best friend. She wanted to grieve in private, which was understandable. I felt so honored that she entrusted me to be in her inner circle of knowing and that my phone call was a blessing, not a burden.

To hold space for someone who is grieving is a great honor. One I don’t take likely. I believe this is part of my Original Medicine. It’s less about what I do, and more about who I am when I simply be and allow others to be. A compassionate witness to their pain. A soft, sacred space to unravel and release the gunk.

A few years ago, another friend called me unexpectedly. She was in the middle of a panic attack. Her wife of over 30 years had decided to leave her with a fairly dramatic exit (of which I’m not at liberty to share the details about). Suffice to say, my friend felt like the rug had been pulled out from underneath her and she never saw it coming.

As she had struggled to catch her breath, she picked up her cellphone and called me. I was the person she thought of in this crisis to help her calm down, ground her energy, and recenter. We stayed on the phone a few hours as she processed through her shock and heartbreak until she could get her feet back under her.

When I think about having pride for something, it’s not about success or reaching financial goals. Sure, those are nice, but for me it’s about the impact we have on those around us and the legacy we will leave when we’re gone. It’s about how others feel about who we are as a person. When our name pops up in conversation, what is the response?

None of us have to formally be “coaches” or “energy healers” to have this kind of positive impact. We just need to show up for others when they’re low. Not to rescue, fix, or offer advice. Just to hold them in love, compassion, and witness them in their vulnerability. To let them be exactly as they are knowing they are fully capable of navigating their way through it.

There’s a lot happening in the world right now. Almost everyone I know is working their way through some sort of heavy challenge. You may be one of them…and if not you, someone you love. It’s now more than ever we can hold the light in their darkness until they remember their own light.